Thursday, December 31, 2009

Moonpie One: Page 25 & 26

Been quite a while since I've posted original Moonpie images.
On the first page here we've got quite the set of images in image. The top shot is of my wall locker at Ft. Lewis when I was in the 525th Replacement Co. Along the left door we have... I have no idea. A cartoon? Then a picture of a woman--possibly Farah? Then a Viva Oly sticker, a Canadian Flag sticker, A picture of Vance, and a painting from a magazine of the late Vaughn Bode, underground cartoonist and freak, who died doing that sexual asphyxiation shit.
Inside the locker you can see an pile of dirty and/or unironed cooks whites.
On the left (as in the RIGHT) door of the locker we see two autographed photos of the Monty Python Troupe. Belows that is a photo of me with long hair, smoking POT!! OMG!! and then there is an old lady with no teeth and below that, Vance,again. Vance has added the note that says "Hey, That's Me!!"
The photo below this shows me standing in the snow atop Sandia Crest, where Vance and I had just driven in his mom's Rabbit. I think I was home for, like, 3 or 4 days ORRRRRRRrrrrr this may be from my little stopoff on my way to Germany.Mmmmmnoooo, my hair is too short. This must be in the winter of 1976/77 because my hair is shorter and I'm skinny as a fucking post. Also I am wearing bellbottoms and Roots negative heel shoes.

On the next page we have...welll... this photo is from an experiment in staying up for 72 strait hours. seriously. I was the only person in the barracks as they had shut down operations over the holidays. I was the only staff person who did not go home. I wandered around, dressed in odd combinations of clothing. Vance has added the caption "What a Man."
Below that, another shot of me at the crest. Here I look remarkably like my son Gabriel who is now older than I was when this photo was taken. Jesus. I'm wearing a Cat Tractor hat, which would become popular in a few years, but then I looked like a dork. I bought the hat from Toddles Deniston. Here Vance comments on my facial expression by writing "I'm Disgusted!"

Rick's Cars #s 5 and 6

I feel like I've already posted the Bonneville here, but I can't seem to find it, so here goes. Mine was a white 1970 with a 455. After the Tempest went tits up and the panel truck was abandoned by the side of the road, we were temporarily without transport. Gayle was, I beleive, still working at the phone soliciting place, and I was working at Pizza Hut. One of our friends was still waitressing at the topless bar where.... I guess I haven't gotten into any of that shit yet. I'm so fucking lost here folks. Jeeze. This guy got it from someone who owed him $400. He sold it to us for $400. The only thing wrong with this car was that it had a busted motor mount. The guy was test driving it and punched it off the line and that big old 455 just ripped the mount loose. It was a fucking monster. This thing also had fender skirts on it which, at the time, I thought were horrendous. It's only now that I realize the true style. Anyway, this was the vehicle we drove to NM with all our shit loaded in the back. Two days after we hit town, the water-pump broke. Vance fixed that as I recall. Then shit just started going wrong left and right and eventually (after some repair work by Sears on Menaul knocked the fuel intake loose) the damn thing caught fire on the freeway and burned all the wiring. I sold it for $50 because I didn't have the title for it. Whoever bought it probably rewired it for a few hundred bucks and had a sweet lowrider.
The Bonneville marked the last of my cool cars for a while. With that car gone, my mom offered to sell me her 4 year old Mercury Zephyr. She'd bought it from a car rental place. Thus began my 20 year hate affair with Ford products.

Notice how you never see old Zephyrs driving around? That's because they were one of the biggest pieces of shit (comparable to a K car) that ever rolled out of Detroit. This was the car I had when Gayle and I split up. I got some outrageous nookage in the back seat of that car and, despite all the shit, I had that car for about 8 years when I sold it to help pay for the next vehicle.

Cars we own now

Infrequent (as in never) contributor Martin Maskill (at left)sent this photo a while back and I haven't had a chance to post it. In the past, Vance and I have posted cars that we have owned over the years, including some of our current rides. I think we've got another shot of Martin with this car (or another VeeDub) somewhere else on the site.
Here is what Martin has to say about this outstanding ride.
The true story is, that this was the last of 4 or 5 bugs that G.E.(stepfather) restored. When he passed in 06, Mom told me to take it thats where it is, with me at home.

It was completely stock, when I got it, but felt the need to "Matinize" it. Completely new front end...narrowed / lowered front beam with disc brakes up front. It takes a lot of stopping power once you get the VW air-coloed motor wound up!

Nice work Martin! This would have been a much better machine to have at South Eu (instead of the Pinto!)

Cornhuskus canadensis

I spotted this prime example of a mature Central Ontario Spuddigger, a relative of the cornhusker. Turns out I'd forgotten to put on my glasses and had just spotted my reflection in the sliding glass door. Cornhuskus Canadensis is also related to Wino freezurassffay, frequently spotted pulling itself erect on northwoods barstools.
Holy shit I look old! I remember when I used to refuse to pick up characters who look like this in my taxi.

But, you remember that song "I was country when country wasn't cool"? Yeah, well I was wearing "Jimmy Durante" hats (as Vance so quaintly put it)back when Jimmy Durante hats weren't cool. I'm kinda wondering, though, why people aren't imitating the Durante style. And, damn if them Rugged Shark "Bill Dance" deck shoes ain't the shits, eh?

Wow, Happy New Year....

This has been a good year for The Moonpie Chronicles.
We have made 432 posts, had 2,750 visitors
and tons of whacky photos that we took from
every source out there, thanks. Many pic's are
"property" of Moonpie but the fact is, we require
much more than we have, so again , thanks to:

pictures unrelated, hawtness, priceless 420, etc., etc.

We also want to make sure that the women keep coming back,
so here you go girls....we will even post guys butts just for you.
I'm glad to have a goofy friend like Rick who had the vision and the brains to put together "The Moonpie Chronicles" so we could have this outlet. See you all in 2010 for more of the same with some new features to be added, including: "Was mom really my mom?", "Bosses we didn't care for", "This wasn't my best idea" and a perennial favorite...."Hey, watch this"
Have a safe New Year and "Peace" from Rick and Vance.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Jobs We've Had: Vance's Early Musical Career

This was Vance's first live performance on television, providing rythym for the great Tennessee Ernie Ford. (That's Vance just to Ernie's right.) Incidentally, Billy Bob Thornton modeled his character of "Carl" from Sing Blade on the footage of Vance here.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Have a Merry Christmas...

The staff at Moonpie would like to wish you and yours a Merry Christmas. Thanks for a great 2009 and we hope to attract alot more of you in 2010. Stay warm and don't crash your car!
Remember, only you can prevent forest fires- Smokey the Bear
Peace, from Vance and Rick and other people who say, "Peace"

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Another sighting of a Cornhusker....

This Cornhusker was spotted in Brandywine, Maryland today, just days after the "Blizzard of 2009" hit the region. Similar to the Western Cornhusker, both are still walking only semi-erect and have a diminished intellect. Oddly enough, both specimens have adapted to wearing what they call, the "Jimmy Durante" hat.

*Note: for those just joining us, click on photo to enlarge image.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

More Cornhuskers...

All of the intellectual giants are here from Nebraska. Larry the cable guy.
Johnny Carson, the GREAT ONE.

And the brain, Dick Cavett.
All this to say, Cornhuskers come in all sizes and shapes. Some smart and others, well, not so smart. Quotable quotes include: "Mr Leary, I think you're full of crap."- Dick Cavett.
"I'd give a years salary just to see whats going on under that shirt."- Johnny Carson speaking to Dolly Parton.
And last but not least, "GIT-ER-DONE"- Larry the cable guy.

Saturday, December 19, 2009


Today is my birthday and we are stuck in the house due to 12"(and still more falling) of the first snow storm of the season. Oh well, we will dig out tomorrow and see whats happening in the world. Today I'm 52 and don't feel a year over 80. Thanks for visiting Moonpie. In three weeks Rick and I will celebrate the first anniversary of "The Moonpie Chronicles."

Cornhuskers, what are they good for....

Cornhuskers are a breed unto themselves. Only walking upright for the last 250 years, these creatures should be watched very carefully. Tom Powell, pictured on the right, was taken for a walk by a trained professional (don't try this at home) so he could fish for food. This creature was able to amass 35 pounds of fish without rod and reel. He simply shouted at the water and the fish died of a heart attack and floated to the surface. Last seen in Texas, Tom has completed his ABC's and learned to count to ten. "He's a dear friend and I'm glad he is getting the help he needs out at the ranch," said old friend Vance Deniston. "Tom and I were both born in Nebraska and we formed a kin-ship while living in New Mexico in the 70's," Vance continued. "I miss the 'ol chap."

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Then and now...

1970 was a great year. This is Miss. Universe of 1970. What a smile.

These are the girls of Miss Universe of 2009. What happened? Are these girls 8 feet tall or what! What happened to change women in 39 years? Was it the McDonalds food or the water? I don't have a clue. Just wondering.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

What he said.....

Saturday Night Live was only really decent the first couple of years. This is one of the reasons why.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Can you hear me now?

Vance, being so upset with the lousey service of Nextel in the Nations Capitol, he went to his garage and developed his new "Super 200 mile Hearing device".
"I'm so pissed that Nextel won't work half the time that I simply had to take matters into my own hands. I'm pleased with the results". With a little fine tuning, the device was put into action today on a trial run. "I went to Ocean City, Maryland and Janet yelled, "It's time to come home now." They worked great." Plans to mass produce this little gem are in the works and they should be available in January 2010. Praise be to God.

Friday, December 4, 2009

Jobs we have now....

The company I work for got a job at the Susquehanna State Park doing wet land plantings and seeding at the dam repair. The park is really cool and only 2 hours from my house. The campground was closed this time of year but I must come back in the spring and check this place out.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

My brother the biker....

This is Blane, my brother. Back in the day he rode
a KZ650 and tried to "play the game" but soon found
that booze and bikes can f--k you up. He's "all better now"
and has a grip on life and motorcycles are fun again.
I always thought of myself as the "biker" in the family
but Blane has the bug and won't let it go. Right on.

In my day, I had so many bikes, I didn't
know which one to ride. I've sold my last bike
so the wife and I can go camping in the
new Camper Trailer. We dig it.
Ride on brother, be safe and have a blast.
Maybe I need a new bike......

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

What we drive today....

Sorry the picture is so small, I'll try again later.
Anyway, this is Martins killer Bug. Being in
Arizona the thing should last forever. Sweet!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Incredibly Sad News from Albuquerque

My sister just sent me an email.

The Hofbrau's gone. Even though it was more recently known as Penn Station, it will always remain in the hearts of the countless barflies who passed through its doors each morning as the 'brau.

"Gone" as in bulldozed. To the ground. It's dead. Nicht mehr. Bleeding deceased.

I worked there for a while back in the early to mid80s along with an ex-wife, ex-girlfriend and cast of crazies.

I noticed that flags are at half-staff today in New Mexico. Fitting is what I say.Here's a couple of Tributes from around the world

I'll be sure to post some reminiscences in the near future from my time spent there.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

2500 vistors and counting...

The accounting firm of Skipjack and Paddywhack has just informed the Moonpie staff that they have now gone over 2500 visitors to the "Pie". Vance was notified at work and said, "this is a dream come true. I never would have dreamed that two balding, pot bellied guys could attract the masses." Rick was unavailable for comment, a spokesperson said something about a sorority bash. Martin and Jones have not been reached for comment at this time. Vance continues, "This all started as something for Rick and I to pass the time, but now we must ramp this puppy up a notch or two. We have an obligation to make people smile at themselves."

"I check into Moonpie just before I go to bed every night." - L.L. Cool Jay

" I laugh my ass off reading this shit." -Prince Charles

"I read everything." - Sarah Palin

Hey, we are just having some fun in a goofy world, stay tuned and thanks for looking in on us.

Peace- the Moonpie Staff.


Some of you may remember last year I told
how Rick and I had worked on a dairy farm
in Belen, New Mexico for a year disguised as
women. We just had to lay low for a while.
Well, all these years later I find out that Rick
is up to his old tricks again. Posing as a college
co-ed, Rick managed to bluff his way into a R.A.
position at the all girl dormitory.

Rick, seen here (wearing the same t-shirt from
27 years ago. Rick never did see the need to give
up on a garment just cause it showed a little wear.)
helps another young co-ed get her "T-back" thong 'just right'.
Rick has been a master of 'shape-shifting' ever since
he studied with that woman in Ojo Caleinte' years ago.
I'm jealous.

Friday, November 20, 2009

Dazzel 'em with bullshit...

There comes a time in every ones life when they realize that they missed their calling. People tend to flounder around searching for some meaning to life. This search will take them to many strange places and introduce them to strange characters. But not our boys! They knew exactly what they wanted and they reached for the stars with the forming of their band "The Furious MacDads." They played to packed garages all over the Heights in Albuquerque and loved the chicks. The band ended up splitting over creative differences, Martin demanded the "pink" stacks because they would match his "guy liner" but Jones would not give them up. The band lasted 12 weeks.

The gangs all here...almost

In 1976 when this journey begins, the three of us are bald faced kids without a clue.
Rick was an artistic type and I was the outdoors freak who loved climbing and Martin had a huge afro.

While Rick and Vance would down gallons of beer, Martin preferred soda and the occasional Vodka and orange juice.

Martins shenanigans were endless. These hijinks stopped after the awful "Clocken bocker" incident at his parents house. Martin laid low for a while....

But, like all things in this universe, life is a ring and things always come around again, even Martin.

Martin...enough said.

Martin has had many styles and interests over the years. Starting in the '70's.
Martin joined all the animal groups decades before it became fashionable and hip.

Martin even had some identity issues for a spell but was a hell of a stewardess and Extreme skateboarder.

All this to say...welcome back Marty!

Saturday, November 14, 2009

How Y'all Doing? Fine. Fine: The passing of a NM Legend.

(AP Photo/Jake Schoellkopf, file)

Bruce King is dead at 85. Our only three-term Governor, King is the man who New Mexicans of my generation equate with the office. He’s also the guy we think of (aside, possibly, from Manny Aragon and Ray Sanchez) when we think of New Mexico politics in general. He was a keen-witted cowboy politician with all the folksy charm of Andy of Mayberry. King was famous for entering a restaurant and shaking hands with everyone in the place, offering a "How y'all doing?" or a "Good to see you again" -- even years after he left office.

An article in the Santa Fe New Mexican says that
"Many who remembered him Friday described King as a far cry from today's slick politicians, someone who stuck close to his country roots and his cowboy hats, once riding his horse to the state Capitol in a move to both save gas and attract a little publicity for the state's tourism industry."
King was the governor who brought Intel to Rio Rancho. But he was also the man-in-charge during the infamous Santa Fe Prison riots in 1980 in which 35 inmates were butchered.

King was also a cattle rancher in Stanley, NM. For years when I heard of the famous King Ranch, I thought it was referring to Governor Bruce’s spread, and was confused when I saw that Ford had released a King Ranch edition of one of its pick-ups. The place ain’t that big.

(So for those who don’t know, THE King Ranch is in Texas and takes up something like ¾’s of the state.)

Friday, November 13, 2009

Jobs We Have Now... English 101

Here is an article from the New Mexico Daily Lobo about a project my students and I worked on. (Well, they worked on it. I graded them. Oh, and there were many other students from other classes working on this as well.)
English 101 students to showcase newfound skills
By Hunter Riley | DAILY LOBO

UNM’s English Department is rewriting the traditional curriculum for its 101 courses.
The department will host its first Celebration of Student Writing on Thursday in the SUB to showcase student projects that incorporate genres of writing beyond essays and stories.

Freshman Meagan Halstead, a student in Rick Raab-Faber’s English 101 class, had to write memos for her class project.

Raab-Faber had his students go out and review local chain restaurants and then design a fictional restaurant to compete with the chain.

“He’s not only meeting the needs of the kids that can write, because some kids get to be expressive through the art part of it,” Halstead said. “I think it’s cool because it’s something that all the students have to take. The students that aren’t that great at writing and the English part of it, I think that it meets their needs, too.”

Raab-Faber said making students work in groups is not his ideal teaching method, but it turned out well in this case.

“I really had to think of a way to get them involved,” he said. “It’s really hard to get kids — and especially these freshmen because they are doing so much adjusting — to do something they don’t want to do.”

Raab-Faber said his class’s restaurant project also required research.

“Based on that, we did reports, we did memos, we wrote questionnaires trying to find out what people wanted,” he said. “We also did reviews and observations.”

Genesea Carter, who is organizing Thursday’s event, said the English Department tried to integrate genre-style writing, such as economics and business writing, into all of its 101 classes.

Carter said the projects are meant to help students learn skills outside essay and short-story writing.

“The way we view writing is changing,” she said. “Students are not coming to UNM to learn how to write essays. They’re coming to learn how to write in their professional and academic fields, which generally are not essays.”

Halstead said her writing project familiarized her with research techniques and business writing.

“Because it’s about restaurants and stuff, it hasn’t been as interesting as it could have been, but I think the process has helped with knowing how to put everything together,” she said. “When you’re in a working environment, that is something you’re going to experience.”

Carter said about 600 students in 25 English 101 sections will participate in the celebration Thursday.

“Students are creating these art installations either as a whole entire class or in small groups,” she said. “I told all of the TAs to be as hands-off as possible because we really want the students to get very excited about creating a visual representation of their work.”

Carter said the celebration will give freshmen an opportunity to show off their writing and creative skills to the whole campus.

“We’re really hoping that administrators come, and that deans come and that families come and that the rest of the campus comes and shows their support to these students,” she said. “It also builds community in their own classrooms.”

*Celebration of Student Writing
Thursday, Nov. 5
12:30 – 2:30 p.m.
SUB Ballroom*

Monday, November 9, 2009

Inter County Connector....Jobs we have

First day on the job at ICC section B. The project will be completed in two years and two days. Completion date, 11/11/11. This story will be updated every couple of weeks. Our contract is 7.2 million and growing. I love this shit!

Saturday, November 7, 2009


I like the time of year.

I can't imagine why. I haven't been snow sking in over 25 years. I must also confess, I never did see a snow bunny dressed like this. That's probably a good thing, I'd wreck into a tree.

Moment of silence for Sonny Bono please......

Dream cars...

This is a fine example of an open wheeled hot-rod. This rig was at the gas station last weekend by my house. I asked if I could take a picture and he said sure. Just behind the other pump is his buddies hot-rod. These guys are going to open a custom shop in Mechanicsville, (duh.) Maryland about 4 miles from my house. More on this shop later.....

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Jobs we have today...

This is the finished project. The Semper Fidelis Memorial Chapel at the National Marine Musem in Quantico, Virginia. The landscaping was a pain in the ass to complete with all the other trades walking through all the time, but the guys did it. I'm happy this turned out o.k.. I'll need to check it out next spring.

Hunter safety ......

Remember to wear something 'red' like the girls cap. Never hunt with your shirt on and always make sure to drink plenty of beer and show your underware as much as possible. Happy hunting.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Ex-Wives #35

Shots from our wedding and subsequent reception. I mean, really, do I need to spell out why this one didn't last?