Another experiment....

Vance and Rick tried something years ago that never saw the light of day, thank God. Their pig, Elvis, was nursing on a bottle of wine when the duo tried to teach Elvis to hang-glide. Unfortunately, there were no hills to be found and poor Elvis just ran around for hours on flat ground with a glider strapped to his back trying to 'get air'. Thankfully, PETA was involved in the penguin march and never got to Rick and Vance in New Mexico.
"Penguins suck. They look my like my teacher's at Christian Brothers High School in Memphis," said Vance.
"My dad always said 'when pigs fly', so I thought I would try," said Rick.
The two left the fields in utter disappointment, the pig never flew.

Scary old girlfriends...

Some of the girls that Rick and I have know have been a little frightening. This chick from Memphis told me that she was done with me and I was fine with that. See, I didn't had a nickel plated .357 magnum like she did. She even took my kick-ass cut off blue mesh t-shirt. Shit.

Then Peggy in Arkansas, well it's a long story but her brother got involved. He said, "no dude from Memphis was gonna take his girl."

O.K., heard ya.

Goodbye Bill Gray....

Bill and I worked together at Maryland International Raceway. I was there for about a year when the new tower and all the upgrades were done. Bill passed away on July 3rd, just seven days after being inducted into the MIR Hall of Fame for years of service. Bill was an older black man that had tons of stories about drag racing and his days in the Air Force. When the track was sold to Royce Miller, the old owner told Royce that Bill would have "lifes stay" at the track, and Bill did. Bill lived in a small trailor by the pits but was usually found at "Camp Gray", his tent site on the other side of the track. Bill was given his award June 26th at the starting line and then went to stay with his son in North Carolina. He died seven days later. He was brought back to Maryland and buried in Aquasco, Maryland. Fitting really. Aquasco was the home of southern Marylands oldest drag strip that is now long gone. Bye Bill.

Girlfriends we almost had....

Much to Ricks disappointment, the neighbor girl he met in Canada wanted nothing to do with young Rick. After an afternoon social of the "We are Canadians Group", Rick approached Lizbeth and she shut him down cold.
"You can't see my pussy and you can't sit on him either!"
Rick said , "screw this noise, I'm moving to New York."