Thursday, April 22, 2010

A Message From Our Founder

(Our Founder. The Right Reverend Dr. Sir Martin Luther Moonpie III, Esq. LLC, a Delaware Corporation)
(Whereabouts unknown)
"Everybody else is just green. Have you seen the charts? It's a hell of a start. It could be made into a monster if we all pull together as a team."

I would just like to take this moment to thank all of our loyal supporters over the years. I'd just ask that you'd open your hearts and minds to the great Moonpie in the sky, and let him guide your hands as you make out a big fat check to Mighty Moonpie Ministries, Inc. Now more than ever we need your help. Funds are badly needed so that we may purchase hundreds of these motorbikes to give to needy scootertramps in poor impoverished 1st world countries. For an extra $125, we can afford to buy seats for these machines.


Please. Think of the children.

In the words of St. Helen Lovejoy,
Why, oh why won't somebody think of the children.


So, please, make that all important phone call today. Operators are standing by.
You Will be blessed.

If you agree, click YES. If you don't love Jesus, do nothing and your credit card will be billed for three monthly payments of $666. The Bass-O-Matic is yours to keep. Serious. What the hell are we going to to with all these fish?

1 comment:

  1. Don't forget, we have prayer towels to sell for $0.66. They do wonders for the savage soul.

    ReplyDelete

Spam and rudeness will not be tolerated. We're here to have a few grins, and if you can't abide, move along. Did I mention Spam? Because if I didn't, here it is. NO SPAM!! That includes saying you like our blog and it's thought-provoking (which we know is a lie) and here's a link to your blog. Basically, if you link post a link to a for-profit site without the express written consent of me or the Big Vance-a-rino, I'll delete your comment and you'll look like an ass or I'll mock you mercilesly for being a dork.
~Peace & Love,
Rick